Rant Baby,Rant.

Your last words were

"Okay, what is wrong"

What is wrong?

Are you serious?

I waited for your message

hoping out of respect you would text

but respect isn't your strongest attribute.

I waited out of love

believing the lies you fed me with but all you did was 

confirm

 lies were your strongest attributes.

It took me days to realize you loved me at your convenience,

when you felt I was deserving.

When you had too much to eat and the crumbs were littered everywhere,

so you fed me with your deserving crumbs.

And oh dear

even your deserving love wasn't deserving at all.

I loved you with all of me

I wish I could change this.

But you thrive on being chased

 so you loved me with the extra things I did to get your attention.

And, Yes

Did I want this attention.

You borrowed my love to love me

no wonder I felt so much void with you.

I poured in so much

and yet, you kept stealing.

So much for telling everyone to be careful 

with whom they entrust their hearts.

I wish I could say I didn't see patterns.

but I did.

I clearly did.

Inconsistency had become your consistent alarm

and as loud as it was 

it never for once woke me.

So I, not blindly,

entrusted my heart to a sinking foundation.

What did you have that made me believe

this could stand tall?

I tried to forget what it felt like to be with you

but you love to linger 

so it wasn't a surprise when memories lingered

after you left.

And till the end, the memories weren't even deserving 

because it never included you.

It was all me. 

All me trying to get you to see me 

Once again, I had let myself down

once again, I had loved too much

once again, I had given someone the satisfaction

that bare minimum was all I deserved.

Mourning days are over.

RIP my love,

I waited for you

 and I almost died alongside a love that never existed.

so rest in love my dear

I'm writing an end without you

I hope to see you not soon.

@Dimensionsofgold